Saturday, October 3, 2009

Something More

So, I have decided that I have to do something to better myself. I have been looking to do this for awhile, though I have been thinking it was reaching my career goals. What I have realized is that there are things I can do right away with my lifestyle that will make me a more complete person. The first is attending church again. I do not necessarily believe that organized religion can “fix” my life, but I do believe if I surround myself with people that have a similar belief system it will benefit me. That maybe I can start doing things that matter for others. Volunteering and helping out in the community. At this point in my life…I work, hang out with friends and sleep. Not much else. It really isn’t too fulfilling. I need something more to be happy…maybe this is the answer. Regardless of how it turns out I am going to start going to my old church… Calvary evangelical free church in Trumbull. If anyone would like to join me I would like the company. Next week I am going to ask my dad if he would like to start going on a regular basis with me. Just something he and I could do together and spend a little bit more time doing something constructive.

Next, and for me this is the big one. I am going to quit drinking altogether…indefinitely. I say “big one” because honestly each group of friends I have go out drinking at a minimum of once a week… Sigma Chi’s, Oxford crew, work buddies. So, this is going to take more will power than I may have. Hence, the going to church and seeking a greater strength from Christ. The reason I am doing this is because I lose my cool increasingly more often when I have had a few too many. I am sick of doing stupid things that I regret in the morning. I need a change, a huge change in lifestyle and I believe that this is the answer…for who knows how long. I plan on doing this in a few ways because I realize it is going to be difficult, not because I crave alcohol but because its what everyone partakes in socially. Those ways are first finding a new way to relieve stress… this one is easy…running …gives me the same “good feeling”. I am going to find some 5k races and hopefully work my way up. The next is always being the designated driver for my buddies. Whenever they want to go out I will offer to drive them around and just hang out. That way I can still be social and not have an urge to join in…because I will be responsible for getting everyone home safely. And, the last is that strength from God’s blessing.

I have already begun the sobriety. And, either this Sunday or next I will begin attending church services. I hope that these two things combined give me the “something more” I am looking for in my life.

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